Sooo, my best friend (who lives in a different state than me – and I’ve known her for 24 years) is getting married in August. I’m happy for her. Really I am. Unfortunately, her fiance has kids from a previous marriage. Now, that’d normally be fine, but whenever the kids come to visit their father.. they take up a lot of my best friend’s time. Part of me thinks it’s great that she’s trying to get involved in the kids’ lives, but the other part? Well, the kids are young, noisy, and frankly I haven’t seen either my friend or her fiance try very hard to keep them in line when we’re talking over FaceTime. To the point where most recently the kids were being so disruptive that they (the kids) hung up the FaceTime conversation – twice. After the second time my friend just sent me a text “Sorry guess I’ll have to ttyl kinda busy with the kids”. I get that kids need attention… but I’m still not used to only having 5-10 minutes of talking to my best friend without the kids interrupting our conversation. I’m used to conversations lasting hours with her. But whenever the kids come over… that time is very limited.
I know that my friend’s fiance wants full custody of the kids, and well, I don’t really like the idea. Yeah, I’m sure they could provide them with a stable home. But with how things have been going? Every time the kids are visiting.. well, my conversations with my friend are pretty much destroyed.
I just didn’t think that this would happen. Not after 24 years of such a strong friendship. I feel like we’re drifting apart.. I’ve already got the plane tickets to go see her for the wedding in August. If the friendship becomes strained (especially after the wedding), well, those pictures will be really really awkward. I just don’t know, I feel like I’m giving and giving and getting nothing in return for my friendship. I know things change, I can deal with most change (hip replacements? Sure. Cancer? Yep been there) but this change? I don’t like it.
My friend isn’t doing anything wrong really, and that’s the problem. I just feel like, hey I’ve put a lot of effort into this relationship… only for it to get like this. I’m pretty sure my friend could tell from the look on my face that the kids were annoying me. They were crawling all over her, screaming and yelling at the top of their lungs. That’s one of the many reasons I don’t want kids. Cats are more my speed.
Anyway, I just felt like I needed to get this off my chest as I don’t think I could ever tell my friend how I feel about her fiance’s kids and her actions.